I think that the key is to act quickly and with a plan that helps you escalate appropriately and effectively.
Think of a staircase you’re going to go up in firmness of actions. Bullies will show you how far up you have to go to get them to stop.
Like Meri, give them a chance at first. Ignore them or ask them nicely to stop. A real bully won’t stop.
Then you must get firmer immediately.
As I show in my books and CDs of case studies, “How to Stop Bullies in their Tracks” and “Parenting Bully-Proof Kids,” bullies are not all the same, but their patterns of behavior, their tactics, are the same. Even cyberbullies. That’s why we can find ways to stop most of them. Sometimes, fighting is the key to success. If we don’t stop bullies, they’ll think we’re easy prey. Like sharks, they’ll just go after us more.
When kids and adults learn how to stop bullies in their tracks, we develop strength of character, determination, resilience and skill. We all need these qualities to succeed against the real world bullies we face as adults.
Disclosure: In addition to having six children, I’m a practical, pragmatic coach and consultant. Check out my website and blog (http://www.BulliesBeGone.com).
Best wishes, Ben
Matt
· 7 months ago
The astounding power of Facebook is that in a blink it can engage so many strangers to harass a person he/she doesn't even know ... just for the fun of it!! So that that person all the sudden finds him or herself surrounded (literally, everyone in the neighborhood, school, workplace, places frequented, can’t escape it, people known, people unknown to the person) by people in on the harassment "fun". Using Facebook (with a video or photo of the person for easy recognition) in combination with organized SMS and twitter networks to stalk and scapegoat someone makes it possible to be especially “clever” and strategic, doubling the “fun”. And gets even more people engrossed in the mob "fun". Thank you Facebook and Twitter for elevating our society and giving losers such a redeeming way of injecting some "fun" into their lives and feeling good about themselves!! Especially “fun” to do to women … but also “fun” to do to men!
All Comments
And great work Meri.
I think that the key is to act quickly and with a plan that helps you escalate appropriately and effectively.
Think of a staircase you’re going to go up in firmness of actions. Bullies will show you how far up you have to go to get them to stop.
Like Meri, give them a chance at first. Ignore them or ask them nicely to stop. A real bully won’t stop.
Then you must get firmer immediately.
As I show in my books and CDs of case studies, “How to Stop Bullies in their Tracks” and “Parenting Bully-Proof Kids,” bullies are not all the same, but their patterns of behavior, their tactics, are the same. Even cyberbullies. That’s why we can find ways to stop most of them. Sometimes, fighting is the key to success. If we don’t stop bullies, they’ll think we’re easy prey. Like sharks, they’ll just go after us more.
When kids and adults learn how to stop bullies in their tracks, we develop strength of character, determination, resilience and skill. We all need these qualities to succeed against the real world bullies we face as adults.
Disclosure: In addition to having six children, I’m a practical, pragmatic coach and consultant. Check out my website and blog (http://www.BulliesBeGone.com).
Best wishes,
Ben